We get up close with Janlee Dungca—PR powerhouse, fierce advocate, and unapologetic trans woman rewriting the rules. In this Quickie, she dives into the art of pleasure, the politics of visibility, and why confidence is just as essential as lube on the nightstand. From steamy date night philosophy to tackling stigma in the LGBTQIA+ community, Janlee reminds us that owning your truth—in and out of the bedroom—is the ultimate power move.
What’s the perfect date?
To me, a perfect date is when I don’t feel time passing. I feel relaxed, comfortable, and safe with the person I’m with. When I [am able to] share what I want, I don’t get the urge to check my phone, and I don't know what time it is... that certain connection is [the idea of] a perfect date to me.
Best and worst sex tip you received?
Best sex tip is to use your mouth like a vacuum… that’s it. Worst sex tip… I don’t have any, because I think I’m surrounded by people who are great at sex.
What gives you pleasure and how do you prioritize it?
I like it when there’s a build-up. If a date leads to sex, I like the momentum leading to the climax. That gives me pleasure when I know there’s a rising action (pun intended).
How do I prioritize it? I do my part. I think dating and sex are performances, so I feel like an actress. Not in the way I’m pretending to be a person. But I always make sure I do my best, and that every date or sexual encounter is a performance. You know what they say, you’re only as good as your last performance.
What sex or relationship advice would you give your younger self?
My spirit animal is Samantha Jones who is also a PR girlie. I always remember this Sex and the City episode where she says, “A guy could just as easily leave you whether you sleep with him on the first date or the tenth.”
I guess that’s the advice I’d give myself: You don’t need to wait after 10 dates. If that person really likes and wants to be with you, then they’re going to keep dating you even after you’ve had sex. So have sex as much as you want, as long as you’re doing it safely. The right person will stick around.
What conversations do you think the LGBTQIA+ community still needs to have within itself?
I think there are two big conversations we still need to have within the community. First, we need to break down the internal hierarchy because some LGBTQIA+ folks still act like they’re above others, and that holds us all back. We have to support each other as equals before expecting allies outside our community to do the same.
Second, we need to be more sex-positive because it is a very important component of the fight against HIV/AIDS. The stigma around sex and HIV in the Philippines fuels rising cases, and that won’t change unless we start talking about sex openly, without shame—starting with each other.
